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Welcome All Visitors!
I am Mr. Rat, head-rat and co-founder of the Rodent division of the Research Institute for the Promotion of Pets (RRIPP). My co-founder and I, Mr. Scabbers, are working on the research project to "Cancel the Human-rat Enmity in the World and Glorify the Nobility of All Wodents, fondly known as project CHEW and GNAW. We began our work for RRIPP CHEW and GNAW most unexpectedly...... Continue Reading about our Ratty Tales below.... or check out my Rat Haiku. After you are done, check out some of our action photos.
I met Mr. Scabbers,
Selecting the appropriate human subjects for our research was critical. A family already enamored with our kind would not be of practical use, as the key success measure for our research is the conversion of non-rat humans into rat lovers. However, a family totally devoid of appreciation for rodents may be likely to, gasp, feed us to snakes. Thus, the ideal family would be a mix of both...so that we could operate safely under the protection of a primary caregiver, while being able to CHEW and GNAW our way into the hearts of the rest of the family. We know that our research could provide the ground breaking discoveries that could benefit rats everywhere and spread CHEW and GNAW. At first, our would be family seemed an unlikely choice. As they were moving toward the hamsters, we could hear the children making the usual disparaging remarks and other un-truths about rats. To our surprise, the mother ("Dawn" as we came to know her) was quick to challenge their unfounded beliefs with some Rat Facts. Of course, children never listen to their parents...and it was obvious by the "do you think I was just born yesterday" looks on their faces that they did not believe her. Just then, the clerk chimed in with her own information (that sounded exactly like the mother's, now that I think about it). The children were amazed by her genius and were quickly scrambling to our bin. As we heard the mother say "Daddy will kill us" under her breath, Scabbers and I exchanged a knowing glance. Our perfect challenge was right before us. Realizing we had to act quickly, I gave the children my best " I am incredibly cute" look and found myself whisked away toward the "pet on the go" box quicker than a wink of stoat's eye. Scabbers grabbed on to me and held on for dear life. We gave one last look back at our friends in the rat pile and we headed toward our new life.
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my co-founder and fellow ratty researcher while we
were each conducting our own independent studies for RRIPP in the small
animal section of the local PetsMart. Together, we created the
vision that would become CHEW and GNAW. Our research proposal was
accepted by RRIPP, and we were given permission to take our studies to a
practical setting.